You need not make a choice.
Although often times one believes this is so.
We are here to tell you or rather share this profound knowledge with you, that toughness is not devoid of tenderness.
In actuality – it is often the most tender of hearts who become the toughest of skin.
Why? You may ask.
Well, think about that for a moment if you will…
Those with tender hearts, the dreamers, believers, givers – those who love the deepest – are always the ones who fall the hardest and are hurt the deepest.
So it only goes to show that those with the tender hears, after suffering from grave loss or deep hurt – find, or learn, or realize the only way to prevent ‘such an occurrence’ from happening again must seek the shelter and solace of a thick skin.
A toughness is born out of hurt and it serves to protect you from a repeat experience.
This in no means translates into an attitude of “never giving a damn” again. No, it simply serves to educate and help you become wiser and safer in the long run.
Toughness is a method you must employ to protect your tenderness, because tenderness and compassion are waning attributes in this day and age.
It is of utmost importance to care for those with tender hearts. Those who suffer will be made stronger and wiser.
But first, we must get through the pain and suffering.
Allow yourself to feel every ache and pain – and reflect back on the experience only to take from it those elements which will strengthen you going forward.
Do not wallow in it.
By separating yourself from the pain and suffering long enough to clearly see the lessons – you can begin to build the walls, so to speak, the armor you require for toughening.
Remember – toughness is not without tenderness.
You can be both. Learning is essential.